Unlocking Growth: Key Reflections on Announcing My Blog

This week I announced my blog on my personal Facebook page. I had always intended to do this but at first, this action was a bit to vulnerable and scary for me. I have been very open about the positive changes a diagnosis and medication have had on my life, both in my personal and professional life.

It was during such discussions that I took a big step and mentioned it to a couple of people I work with. I am so blessed to work with others who are also neurodivergent and are on their own path so we are able to have a greater understanding of each other. This slightly snow balled and I realised I felt ok with it. Word was getting out and so far I had been met with positive feedback.

So I made the jump. It took me few goes to get the wording to a point I felt comfortable and then I did it! I hit post and it was out there. Talk about facing your fears! This is the most vulnerable I think I have been and the anxiety that followed was crazy. The thing is, I have a variety of different people on my FB friends list. They are people I have met all through my life and I have a different relationship with each. In doing this, I have performed the ultimate unmasking. Luckily enough, I have been met with lots of support. 

After posting my announcement, and working through my anxiety, two things have stood out to me

1. My interactions with people over the years.

   
   

   Part of the process of working through my diagnosis is processing all those times when I have said and done something that hasn’t been quite right for the social setting. I can think of many times when I have said things with no malicious intent, trying to convey a story, that have come out completely wrong. It is not till after the interaction that I realise I said the wrong thing. Not having the greatest social skills, I did not know if this was actually the case or not or if I should say something or not. This caused me a lot of anxiety and sleepless nights over the years.

   
   

   In popping this post on fb, I am wondering how the people I know will interpret this information. When I was first diagnosed and I told my closest friends about it, the response was always the same, “that makes sense”. Everything fit. I wonder now, will people look back at the interactions they have had with me over years and have the same response? Will this rekindle some friendships that have drifter off maybe because of my awkward autistic behaviours? Will there be a better understanding and people will think of me in a more positive light now? One thing I have struggled with around my diagnosis is the thought of, ‘if only I had known’. Things would have been so different in so many areas of my life. Having said that, I am in an amazing place now and wouldn’t swap anything, however it is a thought that pops up intermittently. 

2. The amount of people who I know who are also neurodivergent.

   
   

   I have so many friends who are neurodivergent and I didn't even know. It is staggering, although it also makes sense, like attracts like. My post meant people were also able to talk about their diagnoses in a safe and supportive place. I am bringing people together like I wanted to in ways I did not anticipate, starting with my work colleagues prior to this blog and now my friends on fb.

   
   

   For me, this has been so empowering. Being the odd one growing up, I felt a huge amount of empathy for people who were on the outer and not accepted. I knew what that feeling was like and it sucked. I studied psychology at university and this was to help those people (and understand myself, but I hadn’t made that connection yet). Looking back on the last 20 years, I think everything was leading up to this and this is the space I can really bring people together through my experience. I can normalise what people may feel, answer questions based on my experience, help those who may have a loved one doing through something similar or just know that you aren’t alone.

Thank you to everyone who has been so supportive of me. I am so grateful to you all for being yourselves!

Please leave a comment. I would love to know about your own experiences like this

See you soon xx